Sometimes, people on the apps, who have been posting frequently, go on to make an announcement of struggles they’ve overcome with words like - you never know what goes on behind the scenes.
I am not one of those people. I cannot post frequently when I’m in pain or mourning. I crumble. I curl up in bed. I cry a lot. I question God. I want to hide away forever. I go to bed crying and wake up with swollen eyes, then I pray. Sometimes, I don’t have the words so I cry to Jesus believing He makes sense of my tears. Then I call my mother and she comforts me and prays for me in Yoruba. Then I call my sister and we laugh and cry together. Then I go to bed and do it all over again.
As a Christian, I am learning that God is with me in the waiting...in the hurting...in the sadness and even in the doubt. I am learning to hold on to God's report, not the Doctors' report. I am learning to ignore the Doctors when they say I'm running out of time because I serve the author of time and no one can determine how much time I have left, but Jesus. Most recently, I've learnt that I am not any less of a Christian because I cry. Jesus cried, so I get to cry too, if I want.
OUTFIT DETAILS
Zara Blazer || Zara Pants || Versace Sunnies || Amazon Bag || Amazon Necklace
Photographed by my husband.
Hugs. hoping testimonies flow for you and yours.
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